Cooling Off

Around Us

Today is Cooling Off Day. The country is in the midst of a 10 day election campaign and all campaign activities will cease today for voters to recollect their thoughts before voting tomorrow. Ironically, today's weather is scorching hot and there is hardly any cooling off with all main stream news and the Internet media buzzing with accusations and politicking. Politicians are playing up our emotions and pulling our heartstrings by pressing on touchy issues such as, "Do you want a better future for your children? Don't be afraid! Vote for XXX! Majulah Singapura!" Sometimes, I wonder if they understand the meaning of Mahjulah. For the record, although I'm a civil servant, I'm not partisan and I like to believe that I got a pretty good idea of what is a better future for my children. Though my one single vote matters, it remains valid for 5 years before a new Parliament is formed. So, my answer to a better future, though it may seems irrelevant at this point, is my commitment towards fostering values and character building in my children.

Some light humour, see video below.

About You

You have made progress towards your potty training! Good job Champ! Albeit the occasionally accident, you have done well so far and is only dependant on the diapers during sleep. However, you remain to prefer using the diapers to settle your big business. Whenever, you feel the 'big' coming, you will steal your diapers without us noticing and change into it to finish off your big business. This normally happens in your room and when we enter the room, you will (see video below):-

You are 3 years and 3 months old

Its been 5 months since Daddy last blogged. Rest assured that I still care a lot about you, its just that human beings are habitual creatures. I have 'nwuah-ed' for some time now due to the relaxed pace of my work (my boss better not be reading this) and have also spend a fair amount of time on personal reading in the nights. Since you started full day child care this year, also meant going to bed and waking up earlier for Daddy and Mummy as well. Okay, I know, enough excuses, I'm just plain lazy.

About You

In preparation for your baby brother, we decided to send you to a full day child care center in 2011, so that Ah Ma can have time to take care of Di Di when he arrives in this world. You stopped your enrichment classes at YKidz in Nov 10, but your teacher, Janet was kind enough to invite you back for Xmas celebrations. For memories sake, here are some photos with your teachers and friends at the party.

Your cousins, Ri-Ann (L) & Ricole (R)

Your best pal, Audrey

Your Principal, Ms Ng Yu Kai

Your form teacher, Ms Janet

Your other teacher, Ms Jasmine

Your new school is in MindChamps Toa Payoh, no more school bus and Mummy can now (with Daddy occasionally) bring you to school daily. This is something we enjoy and cherish very much as your mood meter is in the 'happy' zone in the morning and we get your almost undivided attention in our conversations. Ye Ye fetches you from school (at times Daddy when I get an off day or 'twang' from work).

Getting really excited for your first day in MindChamps

Initial impression up til now (3 months) shows that you are happy with the new school and your form teacher, Ms Leah (your form teacher) has managed to encourage you to eat on you own confidently. Whenever Daddy and Mummy gets an opportunity to pick you up from school, we are always thrilled to hear you say, "I'm so happy today!" We never quite figure out what you are happy about as you never quite revealed when queried and is often in a hurry to showcase your classroom stuffs to us. Your potty training is still in the works, but at least you can now inform when you want to do your 'wee wee' & 'nrgh nrgh'. So that's a good start.

I'm happy to see you grow up with a great sense of humour. Albeit at times you are shy with people you don't know, we know that there's always a cheeky side of you awaiting to throw us off our chairs.

Our Continuing Struggles

Convincing you to bath seems to take an eternity and has proved to be a challenge. We are not sure how this came about. Could it be due to a/several bad experience or just plain playfulness? Seriously, we don't know and its growing to be a little concern for us as its time and energy sapping for us all in the family. It takes a good 15 min to persuade or trick you into walking into the bathroom, another 15 min to play in the bathroom and lastly 15 min again for the right choice of clothes, which naturally has to be pink in nature. We are mostly late for appointments and what follows is a frantic march to the car and frenzied drive to our place of destination. I've officially demoted Mummy to '2nd grade princess' in the family as there can be only 1 princess in the family and that's you, our spirited child. So, again, good luck to the guy who marries you, not only does he got to contend with your feisty temperament, but also your never ending time wasting antics with 'mor' here 'mor' there.

Our Travels

Before your baby brother is born and looking forward with the next vacation seems so far away, we did a short road trip to Desaru up north in 'Boleh-land'. We had a little fun with the water park and managed to visit the fire flies river trip and ostrich farm. As always, you had the most fun and was indulged with your favourite biscuits. You are still talking about the trip til today.

Getting ready for the water park

The farm worker communicating the ostriches

The ostriches eggs were huge and almost impossible to crack

Weird looking cross bred chicken that had a bad hair day

This one had a hard day at work and was soundly asleep, its not dead if you are wondering

Was this imported from Pandora in the movie Avatar?

Some Fatherly Advice

Recently, Daddy went for a church wedding and the pastor gave the newly weds 3 words, Commitment, Contentment and Consecration. While, I can relate the need for the former 2 qualities in a relationship, no offence to you if you are ever going to be a Christian, I think the last C should be Conscience instead. Why? Consecration is to be holy through a relationship with God, with a good relationship with God brings you a good relationship with your spouse. If you are not a Church go-er, this might sound 'bulls**t' to you, but think carefully, search deeper and you realise by having the same conscience (values, principles or ethics) with your spouse towards life will quite frankly provide a meaningful relationship. So, to crudely put it, to me, God in this case is but a tool for 2 person to share common values (I chose the word conscience cos it started with the letter C, but you know what I meant) in their lifes together. Whether, you are reading this when you are 15 or 25 years of age, I hope I make sense to you. With my infamous short term memory, I hope I can share with you more in future.

Love, Daddy

Raising My Spirited En Xi

For those who have been followed through our blog, or had a chance to meet my Mei Mei in person, you will probably realize by now that she is nowhere near a compliant child.

Don't be fool by my angelic smile, I can be your worst nightmare..hwahahahahah

For the longest time, we have been hoping that she might outgrow her challenging nature once she gone past her babylicious stage. When she blew her 3 candles last month, I have decided to resigned to fate that her package is here to stay. Edwin is also increasingly concerned with this feisty tike, and why every simple task seems like a Mount Everest calling for her. Nothing gets completed without a dose of tantrums. And on good days when she decided to give us a break, it feels almost like striking TOTO!

You can't make me...neh neh ni boo boo

As more and more of our peers join us in the Parents Society, we can’t help feeling concerned when we see how their kids are just so easy to handle. This is also where I will get to meet 2 typical mummies, who are capable of pulling my emotions either ways.

Meet The Competitive Mum, who will rave about how their precious has accomplished the Toddler 101 milestones, and casting a discerning look at Mei Mei, complete with the unspoken judgment that it must have been something that we haven’t done right. We do wonder sometimes, if we have indirectly fed her willfulness because we chose not to use the rod. It might have been easier to keep her in check if we have decided to go with the negative reinforcement from the start.  But I was the more determined one not to, as using the rod would have been an easy way out, and I believe I know what’s best for her. At this point, the Tiger Mums out there might snare at me, as this might be a totally unacceptable parenting theory in their world. I have been brought up in a traditional Chinese family, where defiance is not an option for girls. I may be the compliant child that my mum is always proud of. However, it is also obvious that I lack the adventurous spontaneity like my brothers and always drawn to the politically-correct way of life.

Now for my favorite friend; The Empathetic Mum who will assure us that we are not alone. Instantly, our conversations will always progress to be somewhat like a support group discussion, exchanging our fair share of nerve-wrecking experiences.

Some people advocate kids of Mei Mei’s nature as the “strong-willed” child - a term that I was first introduced to when we attended a parenting workshop. It was then that we seemed to have found the perfect explanation to Mei Mei’s behaviour.

As I actively seek more enlightening answers to manage Mei Mei’s strong-willed traits, I chanced upon a book recently by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka - “Raising Your Spirited Child”. 

Here’s a peek of the traits that characterises a “spirited” child:

Intensify - "..They never whimper; they wail. They can skip into a room, smiling and laughing only to depart 30 secs later inflamed."

How can I not concur with this when most days with En Xi is like watching “Dr Hyde and Jekyll” Live in Action, and it totally resonates with Edwin's exasperation that she can never take “No”  for an answer.

Persistence – “…They are committed to their task, goal-oriented, and unwilling to give up. Getting them to change their minds is a major undertaking.” 

I remembered those days during Shichida when cold sweat will shivered down my forehead whenever we have writing activities. She simply refused to let me hold her hand to guide her, and insist to color all the characters when we were instructed to trace them instead. And the bedtime lights-out ordeal, when she always wants to read the last, last, last storybook till we have exhausted all the books she can possibly find.

Sensitivity -  “…Keenly aware, spirited kids quickly respond to the slightest noise, smells, lights, textures, or changes in mood. “

This is how most of our photo-taking sessions will end up

The every morning saga of getting her to change into her uniform is never something we look forward to, as she will end up cladding something of her choice after some dramatic struggles. And not forgetting her recent strike during 1^st day of CNY, when she refuses to change into the cute cheongsum outfit I’ve painstakingly select for her, as she keeps insisting that it’s not a dress but a shirt.

The poor CNY dress that never make it to daylight

Perceptiveness - ”…It takes them 10 minutes to get them from the house to the car.

They notice everything.”

I feel a sense of relief to know that we are not some crazy parents who have to always carefully strategized every outing, starting from something as simple as a short walk from the MRT, as thou it’s one of Edwin’s ATEC misson, to avoid any potential eye contact with tear-inducing suspects such as playgrounds. Even the same walk to the bus-stop (that takes less than 3 mins) seems like eternity as she always manage to discover something new to amaze at.

Adaptability – “…Spirited children are uncomfortable with change. They hate surprises and do not shift easily from one activity or idea to another..” 

This probably accounts for the taxing emotional strikes she put up when she first started full-day preschool a month ago.

By Page 10 of this book, I can’t help thinking that they should re-name the title to “Raising Your Spirited En Xi” instead.

As the book has rightfully pointed out, life with my Spirited En Xi are equally rewarded with prized moments of joy and laughter. She will ambush us with disciplinary words such as “Don’t shout”, “Cannot push”, “Say sorry” when we haven’t been observing the same ground rules that we have laid down for her. And of cause how everyday is her birthday, and we have to conduct the cake-cutting ceremony and sing her the “Happy Birthday” song for the 10,001th time…her daily supplement of warm snuggles (usually complete with a Olympic dive into our arms) the moment we step through the door…and how she likes to orchestrate a music performance at home, and getting everyone to be part of her rock ensemble, creatively using make-shift instruments such as cup covers as cymbals. 

I'm so happy to be the free-spirited child!!

I’m looking forward to uncover more insightful tips in this book and hope to share some successes in the near future.  For a start, it has definitely help to reinforce my unwavering belief that Fate must have its own plans for her, and setting her up for something out of the usual run of things.   Stay tune for more updates on my Spirited En Xi!

En Xi’s 3rd Birthday Bash – The Pink Party

The planning for En Xi’s birthday bash was rather an impromptu thought.  From the original intent of just having a small get-together with just our immediate family members, the guest list became longer, and the scale of the setup became bigger each time we speak.

The theme of this party was unsurprising.  Since the day she knew how to distinguish colors, she only has eyes for pink. Anything that she could lay her eyes on has to be pink; from her pink shoes, pink PJs, pink bag, and…. even her kite has to be pink! And somehow when she knew that her birthday was approaching, she has been raving about having a pink birthday cake (complete with pink candles) every day. So, Mummy decided to worship her obsession with pink, as a hallmark of her growing-up fetish.

Her much-awaited birthday pressie

Her Pinkie Pink frock

For a change, we decided to take the party outdoors so that we can relieve ourselves from the post-party cleaning up. It was probably the best decision that Daddy had made, as the abundance of space allow the little guests to roam freely, while parents gets to relax in the comfort of the cool breeze. I believe the highlight for the kids was the bouncy castle we rented, something we always wanted to do but constrained by the space at home.

Thou the weather weren’t too kind to us that day, Heroes of the Ong Family save the day with their perfect co-ordination of BBQ culinary skills amidst the heavy drizzle. 

The Chef SWAT - Ah Peh, Ye Ye, Daddy 

As for me, the classic moment has always been the cake-cutting ceremony, seeing how the kids awed over the cake and basking in the joy of singing the “Happy Birthday” song. 

A precious cameo moment - finally En Xi managed to look straight and smiling into the camera

Till…Shou Cong Gor Gor intercepted the anticipated moment of the candle-blowing ritual, En Xi’s angelic face suddenly transformed into a state of distress! We were quick to lit up the candles again and avoid the joyous event from turning into a “bloodshed”. This time, En Xi was determined not to let anyone spoil her day, cautioned Shou Rui Gor Gor with a stern look saying “Shou Rui Gor Gor cannot blow!” (for the record, they immediately became BFF again once they are back at play).

Pink Cake + Pink Ice-cream = Ultimate happiness for En Xi

En Xi, we hope that you’ve enjoyed your pink party!

Love you always, Mummy n Daddy :)

A new year, a new addition

Mummy has been out of blog action for the last couple of months.

In case Mei Mei is wondering - why isn't Mummy contributing as much to my blog? Don't worry darling, I still love you loads and you are still my best, best, bestest friend (our private joke with Charlie n Lola).

As some of you may not know, I'm expecting No.2 now! The baby is coming in May 2011, and the first trimester was really rough for me (it pretty much feels like how you have party so hard the nite before, I felt the same every day throughout the first 3 months). And kudos to Edwin for taking care of Mei Mei to allow me more rest time.

This changes everything..Again

How is Mei Mei coping, many asked me. I have to say that she is coping very well, thou she was a tad emo when we first broke the news to her (leeching to me on the all the time, and oops, she bite again...). But in these couple of months, she seems to have ease well into her impending role as the Big Sister En Xi.

Mummy is a Kangaroo
I've heard about how it's important to prep her that Mummy will not be able to carry her as before, so that she doesn't harbour any negative feelings towards No. 2. So, I started telling her that Mummy is a kangaroo so hugging her might hurt the joey in the pouch. She understands it pretty well, turns to Daddy when she needs someone to carry her. There was once I wanted to carry her, and this little darling told me "Mummy is a kangaroo, cannot carry." (and she said it with a very serious look, as thou she is chiding Mummy for not knowing the rules).

En Xi Jie Jie
We always talk about how she is going to to be a Jie Jie soon, and how she can help take care of the baby with us. Sometimes, she will suddenly point to herself and say "Call...En Xi Jie Jie". Weirdly, she will use a exceptionally gentle tone when she "speaks" to the baby, or sing to the baby her favorite "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" lullaby at nite. Quite an unusual behaviour, considering that she talks at the top of her voice most of the time in the household!

Are you the baby?

It was quite a hilarious incident when she attended her first gynae checkup at about 4 months of my pregnancy. While Doctor Lisa was doing the ultrascan, she was very fascinated with the visual of the baby and heart beat. Somehow, I think she got confused, wondering where on earth that came from. She actually turn to Doctor Lisa and asked, "Are you the baby?".

The 1st Xmas Present

Mei Mei received her first pressie from Didi (yes, it's a prince!) during Xmas. I think she was quite excited about it!

It's amazing how the arrival of this baby is influencing Mei Mei, and I'm glad that it's turning out to be on a positive note (fingers crossed!). I also know that the remaining 5 months will be a particularly precious window for Mei Mei, to be able to indulge in our exclusive, undivided attention. Against all cautionary advice, we have decided to continue to let her bunk into our room, as nothing beats a morning that is greeted by her beaming smile!
-

Dora, but only in Pink pls

A Happy En Xi in her new Pink Dora Nightie (Daddy bought this from Big W 'Mega store akin to Carrefour' in Rockhampton 'Beef Capital of Down Under', Australia)

Its funny how time seems to be an eternity when you are away from your kids. For the umpteen time (I lost count), Daddy is away for overseas work yet again. Its even more weird when you get home and never fail to notice even the most subtle differences in your kid. While it may seem trivial, every parent will always feel the need to exclaim and share with the whole world. So, here I go.

All Dressed Up and Ready for School

As always, you are taller and heavier, 96cm and 13.6kg to be exact. Your linguistic skills are picking up and you are able to express stuff such as, "Its ok Daddy, I'm ok, we can do it again." Unfortunately, your ability to follow instructions is still very much left to be desired. Your obsession with 'Pink' and 'Dora' has done to a whole new level. You are refusing to wear your uniform for school and this has been going on for a month plus now. The only outfit for school is the Pink 'Dora' T-shirt that Ah Ma has bought for you, matched with an orange leggings with a touch of pink, coupled with Pink 'Dora' back pack and Pink 'Hello Kitty' Crocs. We think you are getting over our heads as you always come home from school with the uniform on. Gotta catch up with your teacher for some tricks these days.

Personalised 'Dora' Themed Booster Seat

During my time away from home, Ah Ma finally managed to cajole you into sitting at our dinner table for meals, but at the expense of giving up the baby chair. The adult chair was too low for you, but you insisted on nothing else and we had to give in. So, off I went to look for a booster seat for you and I was exasperated when you refused to even try to sit on it. The problem? It was blue, not Pink! I should had guessed and made the colour of my choice as my primary criterion for selection. There was no exchange policy and Ah Ma came to the rescue again and suggested that you personalise the booster seat by pasting Dora stickers on it.

So much for 'Pink' and 'Dora', your favourite book from the library now is titled 'My Best Best Friend' of Charlie and Lola series. Daddy ponders if he'll ever be your best best friend in future.

Story Telling

Since at an early age, bedtime stories have been a habitual routine for En Xi. Every night, when we say “time for milk”, En Xi will rush into her room and grab her favourite books. She then tosses the books on the bed and lies down with both arms out stretched, reaching for the milk bottle. As she slurps down her fix, we sit down next to her and start reading. Before you know it, she bumps her milk bottle onto your hand to indicate that she’s done. This consummates with her licking her lips profusely in delight, before she sits ups pointing to a book and says “How about this one?”

I’m glad to have had adopted this habit as it allows us a little bonding time every night and more importantly, nurtures En Xi’s interest in reading. As a matter of fact, she has enjoyed bedtime stories so much that she looks forward to bringing back new books from the library. Sometimes, En Xi will read to us, albeit with the occasional prompting. Once done reading, she looks up and the sparkle from her eyes and warmth smile instantaneously energise us.

With En Xi’s affection for reading and her showing symptoms of bad mannerism, such as snatching and gobbling down her favourite snacks. We came up with a brilliant plan to cultivate her values by reading cautionary tales. Our first book was “Say please, Louise!” by Roxbee Cox??? A large text graphical book with emphasis on the phrase “Say please, Louise! A please and thank you is all that’s needed.” At the start, we were taken by surprise with her ease of reciting ‘Please’ and ‘Thank you’ as we flip through the pages. But I guess we did not explain when and how to apply the appropriate mannerism nor did we allow her to practise enough. It all seems confusing for her in the beginning. At times, she said ‘Thank you’ before asking for things and often hurries off without saying ‘Thank you’ when she gets her stuff. Eventually, our constant reminders and patience paid off. Finally, En Xi was able to communicate ‘Please’ and ‘Thank you’ in the right situations.

Delighted and encouraged by En Xi’s progress, we decided to introduce more cautionary tales by the same author, such as “Don’t be Greedy, Graham!” and “Don’t be a Bully, Billy!” But it seems tougher than before, now when we ask “Can we be Greedy or Bully?” She would spontaneous reply “Yes!” much to our dismay. But I’m sure she’ll be on the right track in no time, all we need is a little more patience.

A little Daddy-Daughter Time meeting up with En Xi Favourite Cartoon Character